Jun 9 Tue
Will Jesus forgive my sin?
After Jesus’ arrest in the garden, Peter followed him but remained outside the House of Caiaphas.
He had denied knowing his Lord, and in doing so, he set aside the deeper meaning of his life.
By then, Jesus had already suffered much. A woman once more began to tell the bystanders, "This man is one of them.” Peter again denied it.
Later on, feeling cornered, Peter began to curse and swear. Even though his Galilean accent was giving him away, he said, "I do not know the man."
He was beside himself. In the silence of the night, the cock crowed for the second time.
Probably, Jesus was being led along one of the upper walkways that overlooked the courtyard. The Lord turned and looked at Peter, and Peter almost did not recognize his Master after the blows and mistreatment.
Then Peter recognized Jesus. He would never forget it. Their eyes met for a moment, and Peter was overwhelmed. At that moment, he understood the seriousness of his sin.
There were many other people in the courtyard, but Jesus looked only at him. As on other occasions, Peter felt drawn by Jesus' look like a magnet of infinite mercy. It was just like that day when he could not resist the authority and charm of Jesus' gaze, which inspired his vocation.
There was another time when Jesus' look made Peter tremble after he had protested against Jesus' path leading to the cross. Yet he had never before seen an expression like the one he now saw on the face of Jesus—those eyes full of sorrow yet tenderness.
Jesus' look seemed to say, "Simon, I have prayed for you." It was an encouraging, merciful look that made Peter feel understood and forgiven.
That brief moment was decisive for Peter's life. He recalled his Master's words, “Before the cock crows twice, you will deny me three times." The disciple went out and wept bitterly.
Peter's denial was narrated by all four Gospels, instead of leaving it out. But the benefit of Peter's example of repentance and humility for the first Christians and everyone else far outweighed other considerations.
“If one falls, one must get up at once. With God's help, which will never be lacking if the proper means are used, one must seek to arrive at repentance as quickly as possible, to be humbly sincere, and to make amends so that the momentary failure is transformed into a great victory for Jesus Christ."
Contrition gives the soul special strength, restores hope, and brings those who have fallen to forget themselves and approach God anew. In an act of deeper love, contrition tests the determination of the interior life and always draws down upon itself God's mercy.
“When you seek to draw close to our Lord, remember that He is always very close to you, that He is in you: The kingdom of God is within you. You will find Him in your heart."
Our Lord would have no problem building His Church upon a man who denied Him in a moment of weakness. God always uses weak instruments, provided they repent, to carry out his greatest undertaking, which is the salvation of the human race.